I Give You, A Laptop Eulogy
She was drawn from the earth
in silver and copper first.
Even some really crazy shit.
Like stuff entire continents
suffer through conflict’s over.
She is born of cultural impropriety,
and she is born of the Vaio-Sony Corp.
She has cradled over 100,000 movies and audio files
yearly now, but once she was just the cold,
precise sum of her factory-slid-into-place parts.
I got her in my place,
and she was ready to go.
I filled her up with every
piece of media we could raise.
She taught me all about feminism too
so don’t get bunched in your Haynes.
That shit is just year 4
so we have to behave.
My vaio deserves a full send off, ok?
So where were we oh yes, the first days…
How they went on and on,
I left you on all night a couple,
I fell asleep with you once
in the bed and woke up to you
screen-down, left to what I thought
might have been choked on your own bits,
face down though I re-lifted and
breath of button flicked you came out of it,
you were a champ even then in the
early virgin years, you know that Vaio?
Year two I, like all pc-men, got sloppy with how I treated you,
and we had our moments, a couple reformats if you don’t recall?
(hahaha get it Vaio-la? Because your memory was wiped and all?)
Oh fuck it, by year three we settled
in again like that was all nothing,
and we have some recovery discs now just in case,
right my little digital honey bunny?
Year four and I count every
day we still have as blessed,
we’re like Deckard and replicant
played by Sean Young, heading West!
Maybe we’ll freeze you awhile
and make a 7 year stretch?
What all I can I will do, to postpone your cyber-death
to this alone I pledge.
(insert Perry Ferrel reference here)